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Monthly Archives: October 2008

When You Think You Are Fucking Up

Think of W.H. Auden. Hannah Arendt reportedly described his living quarters this way: “His slum apartment was so cold that the toilet no longer functioned and he had to use the toilet in the liquor store at the corner.”  Two differences between W.H. Auden and the rest of us: (a) W.H. Auden was one of [...]

And Counting

Here is a fact: I have been living on my own (after many years of doing, well, not that) for about a year now. Friends were made! Life lessons were learned! Landlords were avoided! I’ve been rolling these facts over in my mind, trying to understand how my life has changed, and how I have [...]

Busted.

Hey: do you remember “Girls Say Yes to Boys Who Say No?” You know, the infamous poster/slogan that became a touchstone for the second wave of feminism, insofar as it illuminated the second-class status of women within left-wing activist communities by presenting women as sexual rewards for radical men rather than as people who were [...]

Yeah, That’s Metallica. WHATEVER.

Axl Rose has a Twitter. Well, “Axl Rose” has a Twitter. Apparently he spends a lot of time remastering? My suggestion: ditch the “Chinese Democracy” title. “ReMaster of Puppets” is way better. 

Landlord: The Not Sarah Connor Chronicles

Seriously? If you spend most of Sunday in my room, and I keep asking you how soon you can leave, don’t call me on Monday morning. If you call me on Monday morning, and I don’t pick up the phone, don’t call me on Monday afternoon. If I don’t pick up or call back after [...]

Salty!

Do you ever think about who you might like to be when you are an old lady? Have you ever considered that you might be best suited for a life as a Salty Old Broad, a la Cloris Leachman? Yes, Cloris Leachman, who is 82, and who, when asked what she would do next with [...]

How Can We Dismiss the Charge That Palin’s Critics Are Merely Sexist? I Know! We’ll Make a Blow-Up Doll!

Two ways to make sex jokes (or porn) about noted conservative figures:  A) Recognize that the conservative viewpoint is fundamentally sex-phobic and therefore lame, and playfully situate the conservative in a context of super-louche uninhibited fun times, thereby demonstrating that sex is awesome and that the person in question is missing out.  B) Embrace sex-phobia [...]

Resolved: "Writing Every Day" Is an Approach That Has Some Weaknesses

Tonight, I fear, I am suffering from a condition known colloquially as “bitchface.” Here are some reasons:  1) This morning, I hauled myself out of a very comfortable bed so that my Dread Landlord could install a thermostat. 2) The Dread Landlord told me, upon his arrival, that he had decided not to install the [...]

Powers of Horror: Gore, Gender, & Abjection

Here is something you probably shouldn’t try: defending that movie Irreversible. Yeah, you know – the rapey one. Unfortunately, nobody warned the AV Club, and their resulting examination is about as incoherent as you might expect. As you can imagine, I got a wee bit testy after reading this piece and the resulting conversation. I [...]

And Now… I Shall Look Into THE FUTURE!

Yesterday, I wrote that John McCain “has no use for you” – you being the ladies – “unless you’re on his dick, and it shows.” Well, check out his awesome scare quotes here: Hey, “John,” I hope your “melanoma” comes back and eats into your “brain.”