Welcome, reader! As you well know, we have entered the era of Women In Comedy. Oh, sure! You could argue that women were always in comedy! Some scientists have traced evidence of these “comediennes” as far back as 1997. But this summer, what with the Bridesmaidsplosion, it seems eminently clear that ladies are (a) making some hot, hot comedy, and (b) going to save comedy… FROM ITSELF!
Which is nice. Actually, it really is! Given the overwhelming dudeliness of the genre in recent years, I think it is downright pleasant to see ladies pooping all over everything and being terrible at their lives. I said that was what I wanted from Judd Apatow, and damn it, he gave me that very thing! So: No regrets, no hard feelings. HOWEVER, now that the Women are Saving Comedy and all, I think it’s important that we pay close attention to each individual candidate on the field. For, lest we repeat the terrible Munn Wars of ’10, all women are now obliged to support all Women In Comedy uncritically. Yes, that’s right: Every. Single. One.
Which brings us to our latest savior! Her name is Whitney Cummings, and she is very concerned that you don’t think her sitcom is edgy. Because look at the edginess of this sitcom!
[IN WHICH, LACKING A TRANSCRIPT, WE INFORM YOU: Whitney is “A Little Different!” She is insufficiently dressed up for the wedding! “She’s Opinionated!” Her dress is the wrong color for the wedding, oh no! She and her long-term boyfriend are not having enough sex! She eats cupcakes! Sexy nurse outfit! Sexy nurse CATASTROPHE! “See The World Whitney’s Way!” It looks a lot like a sitcom!]
The very edgy sitcom of Whitney Cummings, you see, comes with what sounds suspiciously like a laugh track. It’s not a laugh track, Whitney Cummings would like to somewhat defensively inform you! It is real people, laughing at the comedy of Whitney Cummings! Which will cover the following topics:
It’s basically my stand up in the form of a narrative show, so if you like my stand up, you’ll love the show. All we do is talk about sex and vaginas and vejazzling about how the Kardashians are sluts… its much edgier than the shows without an audience.
Yes, prepare yourself: On this show, a grown adult human will discuss the fact that she participates in SEXUAL INTERCOURSE. Such a thing may sound inconceivable, but it is all too true! But wait, did you hear that she also has… NEGATIVE OPINIONS ABOUT WIDELY DISLIKED CELEBRITIES???? Welcome to the edge!
And, given that this show will be a sitcom enactment of the very edgy comedy of Whitney Cummings, perhaps we would all appreciate a primer in the other edgy comedic insights she has for us:
[IN WHICH, LACKING A TRANSCRIPT, WE INFORM YOU: Men are “obsessed” with “sports!” They frequently wear jerseys for teams they are “not even on!” Also: They use sports metaphors? Women, on the contrary, enjoy such things as “Chanel purses,” and “Grey’s Anatomy.” Different tastes and interests: That is women and men, for sure!]
Yes, contrary to everything society teaches us to believe, Whitney Cummings is here to inform us that men behave one way, and women often believe in an entirely different way! This is a very exciting and valuable insight, which no male comic has ever thought to share with the world. Can you TASTE THE EDGE??? Because you are on it, I assure you! I don’t know. Maybe you should lick it or something.
Anyway. What else is going to be on your show, Whitney Cummings?
Me and my gals are buying sex toys, so. That’s happening.
Oh, how nice! I sure am glad that Women are Saving Comedy. And anyway, for those who cannot handle the sheer, raw edge of Whitney Cummings, NBC will also be bringing us a sitcom created by and starring Chelsea Handler, so…
Oh. Oh, God. It’s going to be a tough year.