Professor Derek Abbott and his team from the University of Adelaide in South Australia have invented the first remote control key fob that allows men to control a valve that can switch their sperm flow on and off as required.The size of half a rice grain, the “fertility control micro-valve” is injected by a doctor into the vas deferens, the duct that carries sperm from the testes, a process that needs only a local anaesthetic. The valve can then open and close to control sperm flow out of the body.
My God. Consider the new levels of marital hostility that have been introduced to the world through the advent of Remote Birth Control: spouses scheming to steal and maintain sole possession of the controller, switching it on or off in the middle of the night (sometimes for a definite purpose, sometimes at random, just to keep each other on edge), battling for custody of it as part of their divorce proceedings… WAIT.
Somebody call Sam Mendes! We’ve got the plot for Revolutionary Road II!