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LIFE OF SADY: Delayed Projects Edition!

So, let’s talk about a very important social justice issue. Let’s talk: ABOUT MY TIME MANAGEMENT SKILLS.

Because the New Year, it hath begun. And I am still working through all the messages I received last month. If I’ve missed yours? Maybe I haven’t gotten to it yet, or maybe I scrolled right past it and now can’t see it as an “unread” e-mail. So feel free to follow up! Especially if it’s urgent!

But, hey. Remember when I was going to make t-shirts? Because I sure do! And am mad at myself for not making them before now! And that has also been a delightful journey. First we were going to hand-make them using recycled sources so as to be fully ethical and affordable; then we found out that wasn’t going to work, considering how fast we’d have to hand-make them and the fact that each one took way too long to make (we had to individually and with a great amount of precision cut out each of the letters and place it on the t-shirt and etc.) and my general incompetence. Then we were going to investigate any number of darling little local businesses so as to spend our dollars wisely; then we found out we needed too many dollars. And finally? FUCKING FINALLY? I figured out how to work CafePress.

Yes. That is the Tiger Beatdown t-shirt. That I have been trying to make for the past six months. And it is available in so many sizes, and colors, and as a hoodie (buying one for me) or tote bag or messenger bag (also buying one, for me), as well! You can give this t-shirt to your dog: They make dog t-shirts! You can order this t-shirt as a mug, in case you are noted Tiger Beatdown fan Matthew McConaughey and wish to never wear a shirt! THIS IS THE TIGER BEATDOWN T-SHIRT: The longest, most laborious, most embarrassingly delayed project I ever finished in fifteen minutes and felt stupid for not finishing before now.

Oh, also! Let’s see if there’s something going on with the Julian Assange case and the left’s surprisingly, virulently hateful misogyny and anti-feminism! Because that always nurtures the soul.

Mr Assange said he regarded himself as a victim of Left-wing radicalism. “Sweden is the Saudi Arabia of feminism,” he said. “I fell into a hornets’ nest of revolutionary feminism.”

Yuh-huh. You know, I could write a 9,000-word blog post about why this is wrong! I’ve done it before! But you know what I’d rather do? I would rather make a joke about genitalia. And I would rather… MAKE A T-SHIRT.

The joke, you see, is that as a person with a crotch, I believe “hornet’s nest of revolutionary feminism” to be an appropriate new name for mine. Or yours! If you don’t wish to call attention to your crotch, however, because that’s gross/people pay too much attention to your crotch already/you don’t really think of it as a “hornet’s nest,” we have an arrow-free design!

Oh, and by the way? I’m getting commission from these t-shirts. And, since 2/3rds of our current products are related, somehow, to the Assange rape case that is being conflated with WikiLeaks while Private Manning sits in torturous conditions for exposing the murder of civilians by US soldiers, and for working with WikiLeaks to do so? For the first week of sales (which is as long as #MooreandMe ran, and when I predict we’ll make most of our sales; what are you going to do, sit there and order a different t-shirt every week? I mean, if you want to do that, AWESOME, but you won’t) all of our profits will go to the Bradley Manning Defense Fund. Because over here at Tiger Beatdown, we can support the project of WikiLeaks and oppose rape apologism and be feminist. Whether Julian Assange — or your e-mail, RANDO GUY #3,148,700 — thinks we can or not.

49 Comments

  1. a.b. wrote:

    If you ever want some hand-screened limited edition shirts, I would do them for you just for all the free awesomeness you bring my RSS feed.

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 5:30 pm | Permalink
  2. Doxy wrote:

    You just made my day….

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 5:31 pm | Permalink
  3. JoeyStern wrote:

    Awesome! Now, as a gay man, can I wear the Hornet’s Nest Shirt or is that wrong?

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 5:40 pm | Permalink
  4. Sady wrote:

    I argue that you can and MUST wear the Hornet’s Nest t-shirt, Joey. For freedom!

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 5:51 pm | Permalink
  5. Lu wrote:

    You are so cute* to think of doing a “Hornet’s Nest” t-shirt without the arrow. Oh! my delicate sensibilities. I am considering ordering the arrow-free one.

    *”cute” meant in an appreciative and non-belittling way. xo

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 6:20 pm | Permalink
  6. copcher wrote:

    If I wasn’t a teacher who had to make sure that most of the clothes she bought were mostly teacher appropriate, I would get one of everything with the arrow. Unfortunately, I’ll have to settle on just one of them.

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 7:04 pm | Permalink
  7. Lucy wrote:

    As if the shirt weren’t awesome enough by itself. I’m all for giving Bradley Manning the credit and support he deserves.

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 7:08 pm | Permalink
  8. Arlette wrote:

    Now that I’ve bought my shirt (YAY FINALLY), I demand underwear with the “hornet’s nest” quote.

    Oh, yeah, I guess I could make ‘em myself. Yay for embroidery skills!

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 7:41 pm | Permalink
  9. SA wrote:

    Question: does anyone know what the deal is with black printing on the black t-shirts? Because I need a “Hornet’s nest of revolutionary feminism” t-shirt like, whoah, but I also do not so much make with the colored tees, preferring to stick with black as is the tradition of my people. But… what happens to the black text/design?

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 8:06 pm | Permalink
  10. Sady wrote:

    @SA: Yeah. It doesn’t show up. I am sorry, lady! The image-making software is very simple! It just applies one template to all available products, it would seem, without regard for which products they are or what color the design is.

    Might I suggest a tasteful grey?

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 8:14 pm | Permalink
  11. mulierosity wrote:

    The different color choices offered for men and women have me puzzled.

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 8:27 pm | Permalink
  12. Christen wrote:

    I’m trying to decide if it would be in atrocious taste, or just very poor taste, to make a statement about kicking Julian Assange’s hornet’s nest.

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 8:59 pm | Permalink
  13. Jenny North wrote:

    This is the best New Year’s present ever. Thanks so much, Sady!

    @ Arlette: Yes to DIY undies!

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 9:23 pm | Permalink
  14. Nicole wrote:

    I miss OPPOSED TO YOUR BONER.

    But I’m buying one anyway. <3 <3 <3

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 9:26 pm | Permalink
  15. Deirdre wrote:

    “Sweden is the Saudi Arabia of feminism,” he said.

    This is a remarkably ridiculous analogy. Just wow, Mr Assange, wow.

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 9:32 pm | Permalink
  16. B. wrote:

    I ordered a pink shirt with an arrow! I will wear it everywhere. I already spend a lot of time gesticulating lewdly at my crotch; this shirt will save me a lot of effort in the long run.

    Wondered briefly whether there should be more than one hornet (“a hornets’ nest”), but actually I don’t think so. The hornet is my clitoris.

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 9:33 pm | Permalink
  17. SA wrote:

    Sady – boo, Cafe Press. Seems like they used to have a separate template for their dark shirts. This is my sad face.

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 10:45 pm | Permalink
  18. Mimi wrote:

    But, but… Where is the one that says

    [Boners]

    because really, would that not be the funniest thing? Not that I’m asking you for more work or anything, but I’m tired of that shit Asswipe and do not want to advertise him, regardless of your unending awesomeness in being the undying mistress of twitter hashtags.

    Also, just because the [Boners] post is about my favorite thing ever.

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 10:53 pm | Permalink
  19. Colleen wrote:

    Can I second the motion to bring back OPPOSED TO YOUR BONER? I will definitely be buying at least one though, thank you Sady!

    Monday, January 3, 2011 at 10:55 pm | Permalink
  20. Renee wrote:

    fuck yes! I was wondering what happened to the shirts. yay, now I can buy a shirt!

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 12:18 am | Permalink
  21. sarrabee wrote:

    Please, please, oh, PLEASE offer these in the larger plus-sized shirts.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 1:23 am | Permalink
  22. Jess wrote:

    Stieg Larsson’s new bestseller:

    The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest of Revolutionary Feminism

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 1:35 am | Permalink
  23. c wrote:

    I would totally buy an OPPOSED TO YOUR BONER shirt! This is what I was waiting for, so I could purchase it, with my money! Sady, please, HELP ME TO OPPOSE BONERS EVERYWHERE.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 8:00 am | Permalink
  24. Alvaro Pirado wrote:

    The arrowed Hornet’s nest design lends itself well to indicating something other than a crotch–on the baseball cap or the messenger bag, say–but my favourite still has to be the teddy bear with the tiny t-shirt pointing at its bare, fluffy, featureless groin.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 9:58 am | Permalink
  25. A t-shirt I haven’t gotten around to making yet, but may someday:

    *I* am the Saudi Arabia of feminism.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 11:42 am | Permalink
  26. Oh, also – I’ve successfully made white on black shirts at Cafe Press before, so it can be done; just with a different design.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 11:46 am | Permalink
  27. Spiffy McBang wrote:

    At first I wondered why the “Hornet’s Nest” tote bag and mug have the arrow. I mean, those would be obvious arrow-free choices, right?

    Then I thought about it in practice. You can make your table or counter or small child a Hornet’s Nest just by placing the mug on it! And if you’re lugging around the tote bag, you can be like, “That’s right, my hip/thigh/knee is a goddamn Hornet’s Nest of revolutionary feminism!”

    I think that’s a win.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 12:04 pm | Permalink
  28. Grace wrote:

    Jess, I was so going to make a reference to Stieg Larsson but you beat me to it!

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 1:05 pm | Permalink
  29. beth wrote:

    bought a tote bag! sooooo excited

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 1:45 pm | Permalink
  30. tenya wrote:

    I think I really must have the shirt, even if almost nobody in my acquaintance would get the joke.. still, my mad giggling would make it totally worth it.

    Also, I showed it to my boyfriend:
    “you DO realize that will result in me shrieking “BEEES! BEEEEEEEEES” every time I go near”
    how could I say no now??

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 3:36 pm | Permalink
  31. Stephanie wrote:

    Holy shit I wish they had maternity sizes, because of all the shirts that point in the vicinity of the child growing inside me the one that refers to a hornets nest of revolutionary feminism would be the most apt.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 3:42 pm | Permalink
  32. sarrabee wrote:

    @Stephanie – Cafe Press does offer maternity sizes, just as they offer plus sizes for men & women. It’s up to Sady to offer her designs in maternity & plus sizes, though.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 3:54 pm | Permalink
  33. alumiere wrote:

    I’m so glad you cross posted – my disqus fu is non-existant and I couldn’t figure out how to comment/ask there.

    Any chance you could do a black version of the radical feminist shirt? White and I do not get along well (purple hair dye does not wash out of fabric but it rubs off my hair), and I love the message!

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 3:59 pm | Permalink
  34. Sady wrote:

    @Sarrabee: Do you know how to do that? I wasn’t offered control over the sizing. When I look at it, I see that plus-sizes are on offer, though. Do they not show up when you go there?

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 5:36 pm | Permalink
  35. Gretchen wrote:

    Love the Hornets’ Nest shirt, and may buy two on pay day (one with and one without an arrow).

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 8:09 pm | Permalink
  36. Kate in SF wrote:

    That is so awesome! I couldn’t wear the one with the arrow, but think it’s brilliant. And I really love that you’ve dedicated the proceeds to Bradley Manning. Pretty much says it all. Go girl.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 8:42 pm | Permalink
  37. RGR wrote:

    I’m going to buy probably one of each of these.

    But I really, really also want an “opposed to your boner” shirt.

    So, what would it take for that to happen? You have many readers who also really, really want that shirt and who have at least minimal photoshop or illustrator skills, if that’s what it would take. We want to help! We want to give our money to publicly oppose boners and help causes which we believe in! I would pay extra to add an “Opposed to your boner” to that tiger shirt.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 10:15 pm | Permalink
  38. sarrabee wrote:

    @Sady Well, the unfitted tees go up to 2X, but Cafe Press offers fitted women’s tees (v- and scoop-neck; black and white) up to 5X (32/34). I don’t actually have a Cafe Press shop, so I don’t know how to offer plus & maternity sizes. I’m sorry.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 11:23 pm | Permalink
  39. Marley wrote:

    Oh my. I just bought the regular logo shirt, but may have to go ahead and get a hornet’s nest shirt as well. Without an arrow. I love the option! And I love that I can get A SHIRT FOR JUSTICE.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 11:37 pm | Permalink
  40. Marley wrote:

    OH WAIT I JUST DID. Two shirts for justice! Ahaha!

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 11:40 pm | Permalink
  41. Sady wrote:

    @RGR: I KNOWWWWWWWWW. The thing is, last time I aired the design, people wanted the URL! And I don’t think I have an advanced enough CafePress setting to make it print on front & back. There may be a special t-shirt on the way for the [BONERS]-lovers. THERE MAY BE.

    @sarrabee: I’m super-sorry. I think the account I have is way too basic for what I need. So maybe I’ll try to give them more money, & they’ll let me control sizing? Or something? Because I want everyone who wants a t-shirt to get them. And none of this is in the freaking Help documents. So I don’t know how to make it happen.

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 11:43 pm | Permalink
  42. GGeek wrote:

    I just tried to open my own CafePress shop to see if I could figure out any of the things you’re having trouble with, and I have to say, they don’t make it as easy as they could to find answers to simple questions. But put enough people on it, and we can conquer CafePress!

    Short version: I’m a geek, and I’d like to help. Shoot me an email if you get fed up and need a fresh set of eyes.

    Wednesday, January 5, 2011 at 2:02 am | Permalink
  43. Michelle wrote:

    oh man, i want one of those tiger beatdown to put all my library and textbooks in (heh heh), but that shipping on that BAMF is OUTRAGEOUS.

    Wednesday, January 5, 2011 at 3:30 am | Permalink
  44. Michelle wrote:

    oh man, i want one of those tiger beatdown totes to put all my library and textbooks in (heh heh), but that shipping on that BAMF is OUTRAGEOUS.

    Wednesday, January 5, 2011 at 3:32 am | Permalink
  45. lilacsigil wrote:

    Thanks for remembering the fat and/or very busty feminists too! I look forward to plus size shirts some time in the future.

    Wednesday, January 5, 2011 at 4:11 am | Permalink
  46. GallingGalla wrote:

    I don’t wear screen tees, so I won’t be buying a t-shirt (but I might get a coffee mug or similar), but I have donated a bit to Bradley Manning’s defense fund and signed the petition to Quantico.

    I’m really glad that you’re posting on Manning; I was (and still am) afraid that he was going to be totally disappeared by the media.

    I hate how Assange is getting lionized by the media and the manarchist left while the person who took the real risk – Manning – is being tortured for months on end and no-one gives a shit.

    All this is happening on Obama’s watch. He can stop the torture with an executive order. He can pick up the phone and have a private conversation with Quantico’s CO.

    Wednesday, January 5, 2011 at 11:32 am | Permalink
  47. sarrabee wrote:

    @sady Alas! I know you’d offer them if you could. Because you are fantastic. I’ll keep checking back. Perhaps I’ll get a tote or mug in the meantime!

    Thursday, January 6, 2011 at 1:28 am | Permalink
  48. SA wrote:

    Sady – if you are not too overwhelmed with requests for different variations in your shop, I went through multiple rounds of “HELLO HOW WILL THESE BLACK DESIGNS LOOK ON DARK SHIRTS” with CP’s customer service, and they finally agreed that yes, they will not show up on black tees. HOWEVER if you uploaded a version of each design that swapped white ink for black, then TB fans could order the white ink versions on the dark or medium color tees. Obviously a project that took you a long time to get going on is not necessarily a project you want blowing up to enormous proportions, so if it doesn’t happen, that’s cool, but I would totally buy a white design on black tee and support the cause.

    Thursday, January 6, 2011 at 10:27 am | Permalink
  49. lil sis wrote:

    bought one for me and one for my sister. very happy to get something awesome and be supporting an awesome cause and website at the same time. :D :D

    Monday, January 10, 2011 at 5:59 am | Permalink